Relationship built by Facebook. How real is real?

I still can’t forget about that day. Around three years ago, I was a university freshman. After a seemingly never ending three hour whatever lesson, I survived. I was chit chatting with my new friends. They are so passionate about my everything. That’s the characteristic of every freshman I bet; eager to make friends as soon as possible. Time passed by, seemed like we didn’t have much time to hang around anymore and we were about to say good bye. Here came the 21th century social etiquette. All of us were supposed to exchange our msn and Facebook account. I exchanged my msn account with them.  ‘Hey, how about your Facebook?’ they asked. ‘I don’t have a Facebook account.’ I said ‘What?! How could it be?! You are so outdated.’ All of them shout. ‘Open one!!!!!’

Before that, I thought Facebook was just a waste of time, I don’t like sticking around at the virtual community, I didn’t feel like the need to present myself virtually on the web in order to obtain an identity. But under all the pressure and shouting, I surrendered. I got home, turned on my notebook, went to Facebook .com and create an account. I entered my email address, my name and all. Simple. Two minutes. Done. I was finally part of the Facebook family. The process of evoluving from outdated to an up to date guy has never been simpler. I felt refreshed, relieved and inspired. (you guys are probably thinking about ‘Shut it!! Cut the crap!!’) OK, I was exaggerating, but the Facebook account really did give me the chance to explore more about the web 2.0

After I first logged in, Facebook recommended some unknown people to me and suggested me to make friends with them. I thought it’s a must to pick a few people in order to proceed to the next step. So I randomly picked a few of them. Added them. they accepted in a manner of minutes. Then I had my first few Facebook ‘friends’

The next day, I exchanged my account with my Uni mates. There were around ten of them. Just in that week, my friends on Facebook increased by 500% from ten to sixty. The number kept increasing, seventy, eighty…. I was amazed. I was proud. I thought this was something to show off. But when I looked the pages of my friends, I felt so little. Many of them have several hundred friends in their friend list, some even three thousands. What the hell! How could it be?

Here comes the question. Where the heck on earth do all the three thousand friends come from? I really doubt the online relationship. Let’s not talk about others, come back to me. Several days after I opened the account, many people whom I thought were already history (to put it in a nicer way, they were not in my memory anymore for a long period of time), appeared in my life again. They added me on Facebook. These people include some secondary school friends, primary school friends and some I can’t even recall when and where I met them. To put it simple, I have lost contact with them for at least five, if not ten years. I have no idea how they got me, but it’s probably the friend recommendation function of Facebook.

I really appreciate the fact that Facebook tries to keep everything real. We are supposed to set up our account based on our real information. Facebook is supposed to be the extension of our identity on the internet. Relationships in this community are supposed to be real also. But somehow I am confused by the lost and found relationship with my ‘long time no see friends’. Sometimes I wonder if we pump into each other on the street, will we even say hi to others. The friend recommendation function is plausible by nature, but many users just abuse it. They just accept whatever the system suggests. Real friendship does not exist in this sense.

The ‘like’ button is another great invention by Facebook. But sometimes I doubt the underlying meaning of ‘like’. Sometimes ‘like’ can really mean someone appreciate your Facebook content. But at the same time, some people just like your status and all for no reasons. I always have experience that just a few seconds after I shared articles on Facebook, the system informed me my stuffs were liked by my Facebook friends. Everything just happened in a blink of an eye. I admire the awareness of my friends. But I don’t think they had the ability to digest the articles in just a matter of seconds. I think the ‘like’ button serves the purpose of proving one existence. It’s just like a way to remind others they are still alive by grabbing your attention by the ‘like’ function.

I am not a Facebook hater, I am a Facebook lover. In fact, I am a bit addicted to Facebook. It’s just part of my life. I really like how Facebook keeps me and my friends connected. It gives me the chance to maintain good relationship with my newly made friends at Uni. It is all our choice of how to utilize Facebook to keep relations real and authentic.